Valentine's Day: A Poem

A silly little Valentine's poem, which does not start with "Roses are red..."

When you want to tell that special someone
You think about every day
That you think about them every day
But in a non-creepy way.

If only there was a time in the year
When this was considered okay
Thank God for Mister Valentine
Who created his very own day.

There is now the perfect time to give
Your perfect lady or chap
The gift that they have always wanted
Like a balloon, or some other cheap crap.

But do not tell them who it’s from,
Your name you must not sign
Be subtle, be romantic (creepy)
“From your Valentine.”

Or if you’re feeling confident
That your chat-up line is first-rate
Then go up and tell them face-to-face
You might even get a date.

Take them to a nice restaurant
And end up going berserk
When you’re told that on this ONE single day
Your discount voucher won’t work.

Finally, a note to all you couples
With your happy loved-up smiles
Spare a thought for those of us
Who have been single for a while.

Yes, that’s me on my own in the pub
Drinking a bottle of wine
I raise my fifteenth glass to you
Mister Bloody Valentine.

I'm actually a hopeless romantic myself. Check out this incredibly heartfelt love song...recorded whilst alone...in my bedroom...to nobody...

Applications for the post of "Glynn's Valentine" are now open. Tweet me @TheRealGlynn to apply.

Please apply.

Please.

I'm joking - I'm not desperate.

But seriously, just apply.